


In the darkest night (I'll be your light)

by flaminpumpkin



Series: DC Random Fics [1]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics), Green Lantern - All Media Types
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Background Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-17 14:00:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29226633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flaminpumpkin/pseuds/flaminpumpkin
Summary: Something goes terribly wrong during a mission and Bruce is left to deal with his guilt. Thankfully, he's not alone.
Relationships: Hal Jordan/Bruce Wayne
Series: DC Random Fics [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2145969
Comments: 4
Kudos: 62





	In the darkest night (I'll be your light)

**Author's Note:**

> I am so far down this hole I can't even see the light of day anymore so please have this. It's based on this work ( https://twitter.com/htnks2/status/1302932558699573250?s=19 ) by the lovely @htnks2 on twitter! 
> 
> This is my first actual work for this fandom except for the one or two drabbles I wrote on tumblr so please, have mercy on my soul. And if anything needs to be added in the tags, please let me know!  
> Also, english isn't my native langue so I apologize in advance for any horrendous grammatical or spelling mistake!
> 
> Hope you enjoy! ^^

Bruce was sitting on a stool in the med-bay part of the cave, shoulders hunched, curved forward as if to protect himself from the harsh white light of the neon, to shield his battered body from the accusing stares of people who weren’t of this world anymore. He stared blankly at the large gash on his thigh, long since taken care of by Alfred’s expert hands.

He considered himself lucky. He was alive. Safe and sound in his home, surrounded by his family. Unscathed, mostly.

Unlike the little kid that had stood there, crying and petrified in front of the warehouse when Black Mask’s men had detonated the bomb inside.

A shaky exhale escaped his lips and it was almost painful. To simply breathe.

He leaned forward, his cape pooling around him as he let his head fall in his hands, memories of the night flooding his mind.

The mission had gone awry almost as soon as he and Jason had arrived on site.

Jason had come a week prior asking for his help on a case. They had been tracking down a shipment of what they had believed to be brand new laser tech for Black Mask. They had been wrong. Oh, had they been wrong. And they had realized that the moment the doors of the container had opened, terrified gasps and sobs from the children inside it echoing in their ears.

It had been the exact moment everything had gone south, starting with Jason suddenly being down there beating up Black Mask’s goons, drawing out one of his guns and aiming it at one of them, completely unaware in his rage of the gun aimed at _him_. Bruce had jumped down from his hiding spot and thrown himself at his son, effectively tackling him to the ground.

Everything else was a blur, fuzzy memories heavily tainted by Bruce’s own anger and resentment towards himself. He remembered desperately clawing at Jason to keep him from going on a rampage while trying to take the dozen of kids to safety; remembered fighting off goons and distantly hearing one of them calling retreat, shouting that they needed to blow up the place. He remembered scrambling outside with children hanging tightly onto him and Jason.

But everything faded the moment his brain stopped on this one scene, on this reminder of his failure. On this little kid, not older than ten year old, disappearing, engulfed in smoke, flames and debris as the warehouse exploded.

Jason had stormed off the moment police had arrived, leaving Bruce to deal with the aftermath of the event. Probably to one of his safe houses. Safe house that most certainly looked like a wreckage now. Children had always been a sensitive subject for Bruce but it was even worse for Jason. The moment kids were concerned, his second oldest son’s reactions were always reckless, driven by raw emotions, most of the time rage. Bruce really couldn’t blame him, even if he wished he was more careful.

He had gone through all procedures mechanically, retelling the events to Gordon who had kept throwing worried glances at him, probably worried that Bruce – not Batman, Bruce, because he knew – would snap and collapse. But it hadn’t registered with Bruce’s brain. Despite his flawless composure, the scene had kept replaying in his head except that every time, the little kid had been replaced with one of his own.

Dick. Damian. Cass. Tim. Stephanie. Duke.

Jason. Jason. Jason.

And inevitably, he had been brought back to that night. The one he had lost Jason. It was a miracle he hadn’t driven himself to death on the way back to the cave. He couldn’t even remember doing it.

All he could remember…

Shudders wracked his body and he curled further in on himself.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered around the lump of guilt in his throat.

“Spooky?”

His blood ran cold. Suddenly he was petrified, unable to move, to shy away and flee in the shadows, away from this warm, honey sweet voice. Bruce didn’t want Hal to see him like this. He didn’t want to see the disappointment in those chocolate brown eyes, the ones he loved so much. He couldn’t bear to see it, not after everything that had happened tonight.

But his body couldn’t move. He sat there, frozen, curled in on himself like a scared child as footsteps stopped right behind him and a soft green halo surrounded him.

“Jason called me,” Hal said in a gentle voice and Bruce knew that he knew.

He knew that Jason had told him about the terrible outcome of the mission and yet he was here.

“It’s not your fault-”

“It is,” he snapped, more harshly than he expected.

Behind him, Hal stayed silent for a while. Of all the times this chatterbox of a man chose to not bite back at him, it was tonight when Bruce needed someone to fill the silence so he couldn’t think. He ached for someone to lash out at him, to tell him how badly he had failed. Surprisingly enough, Jason hadn’t been that person. His son was certainly too busy blaming himself for that anyway.

“I’m not gonna fight with you,” Hal finally said after some time, softly but firmly as his hands landed lightly on Bruce’s upper arms and squeezed. “You did your best. Mishaps happens. You think I’m not aware of that? I’m in charge of entire space sectors for fuck’s sake. I’ve seen people under my protection get severely injured or killed more than once. It hurts like hell and you feel like shit but that’s how life goes.”

Of all the time Jordan chose to try and be wise… But it made sense. Of course it made sense. Bruce knew he couldn’t save everyone, that people getting hurt or worse was something that would always happen. And yet… He couldn’t help but feel like he could, _should_ have done more. That he should have done better, that he should have reacted faster and dived back to save the kid even though it had only been a split second between him and Jason looking back and the bomb inside the warehouse going off. A haunting split second.

“It’s our job-” he tried to argue back but his voice sounded weak, even to his ears.

“It’s our job, yes,” Hal cut him off and Bruce felt him bend forward and mold his torso along the curve of his back, his chin resting lightly on Bruce’s shoulder. “But you and I… we’re still only human, Spooky. We’re still human. We fall down and bleed. We get hurt. We fail. But we’re also stubborn as fuck so, no matter what, we get back up, right? We keep fighting.”

And any other day, Bruce would have fought back. He would have told Hal exactly where he had fucked up, which step had been the wrong one. He would have argued.

But not tonight. Tonight, he was drained. Physically and emotionally. All he wanted to do was curl up against the other man and forget the awful, unfair world outside. He wanted to drift away from this harsh reality that was theirs. Just for once.

“I’m sorry,” he choked up again.

To the kid. To Jason, to Hal.

The fingers around his upper arms tightened and he felt a shiver coming from Hal’s body. Or was it from his? He didn’t know. His senses were all over the place at this point, his only anchor the thumbs tenderly stroking his arms, Hal’s warm breath against his covered neck.

“You’ll be fine. Everything’s gonna be fine.”

A kiss on his nape through the material of his cowl, Hal’s body resting more heavily against his, reassuringly, like a weighted blanket. Anchoring him, bringing him back to safety.

“I swear, Bruce. I swear.”

Bruce surrounded to these words, let himself be carried by them. He let that tender voice, that tender man pull him in. He straightened back up a bit, raising his head.

Inhale. Hold. Exhale.

Again. Several times.

The weight on his chest was still there and certainly always would be after tonight. But Hal was there as a reminder. That he wasn’t alone in this.

“I’m fine,” he whispered after long minutes of silence. “I’ll be fine.”

“Yeah.”

Hal wrapped his arms around his shoulders fully, tightly, holding him close to his body, one hand traveling down to lace his fingers through Bruce’s. Shielding him, he realized and he let his body sag against the firm one behind him at the thought, let himself be protected. _For once in your goddamn life_ , Hal would probably say in an exasperated tone, like he always did.

“Everything’s going to be fine,” he repeated and squeezed Hal’s hand in his, tightly.

“Yes, love. Everything’s going to be fine.”

It was the last thing Bruce remembered before his brain finally – blessedly, he’d even say – shut down on him.

When he came to consciousness again, hours later, he was cradled close in Hal’s arms, under the warm covers of his bed, a stray ray of sunlight filtering between the heavy curtains. He vaguely remembered through his haze, waking up in cold sweat a couple of times only to be gently lulled back to sleep by a hand his hair and sweet reassurances murmured in his ear. He was also eighty percent sure that at some point he remembered a green halo surrounding him, like when Hal made a construct appear around him during mission to protect him. Had it been the intention behind the action this time too?

“Slept well?” came the raspy mumble of Hal’s voice from somewhere above him.

Bruce tilted his head away from where it had been tucked under the other man’s chin, eyes landing on his lover’s tired face. Hal looked exhausted, his bleary eyes barely open, dark circles under them and a light stubble on his jaw. It seemed like Bruce had kept him awake the better part of the night.

“I apologize for keeping you up,” he whispered roughly, one of his hands coming up to cup Hal’s face.

“I’ve had worse,” the pilot said around a loud yawn before bringing Bruce back against him, burying his nose into the bird nest that was Bruce’s bedhead.

They stayed there, silent, for long minutes. Maybe even hours. Hal held Bruce close to him, never faltering, his hand stroking up and down his spine. Bruce breathed him in, allowing himself to be comforted until he was inevitably forced to get up and go relieve himself. He took advantage of being alone in the bathroom to pause and look at himself into the mirror above the sink. His eyes were red and sunken, his already pale skin had taken an ashen tone. He honestly didn’t look any better than Hal.

“Are you ok?”

Icy blue met warm brown in the mirror. Bruce could see the slight tension in Hal’s shoulders as he leant against the door frame, arms crossed. _That’s my shirt_ , he thought offhandedly before answering after a worrying amount of time if the frown on Hal’s face was anything to go by.

“I’ll deal.”

Hal huffed and rolled his eyes, clearly annoyed.

“I know you’ll deal, asshole,” he mumbled as he came to stand behind Bruce, arms wrapping around his waist and hooking his chin over his shoulder. “I’m asking you if you’re ok. I just want an honest answer on how you’re feeling right now.”

There was a long silence during which they just stared at each other. Bruce could feel the intensity of the other man’s gaze even through the mirror. He was looking at him like a hawk, probably looking for any sign of Bruce pretending he was alright – which had become embarrassingly easy for him as time went on. He knew it was useless and he was still too drained to do anything but rely on Hal’s support anyway.

“No,” he finally said, one of his hands coming up to clasp one of Hal’s, giving it a light squeeze. “But I will be. Someone promised me I would.”

Hal continued to stare at him for a few seconds, seemingly searching for something, until a small crooked smile stretched his lips and his arms tightened around Bruce.

“Mhm,” he hummed, tilting and turning his head to the side so he could look directly at Bruce. “I wonder who that wonderful someone is, to be able to get an idea through that thick skull of yours. Now come here-”

And Bruce was ready to let himself be lulled back to a somehow peaceful state by Hal’s soothing presence behind him until a sudden thought struck him.

Jason.

He hadn’t checked on his son at all since the day before and after the events of the night, he needed to make sure he hadn’t driven himself insane with guilt.

“I need to check on Jason,” he said decidedly, taking a step away from the sink and towards the bedroom.

Or at least he tried.

If there was one thing in this world that was immovable, it was Hal Jordan when he had decided something. And apparently, he had decided that Bruce wouldn’t take a single step outside of the bathroom. No amount of pulling and pushing would loosen the vice he had around Bruce’s waist.

“Yeah, no,” Hal chirped after the other man finally gave up with a defeated sigh. “Jay will be alright, trust me. He’s been with Roy all night and if this kid knows how to do one thing, it’s taking care of his friends. Especially that one. Leave him a few hours and some space before charging in there.”

It was a relief, really, to know that Jason hadn’t spent the night alone. And Hal was right. Roy Harper had always been there for his son and he was a good man despite what the kid seem to think of himself sometimes. Knowing he was the one with Jason brought comfort to Bruce. He was probably going to rip him a new one for letting Jason go on his own after such a night but he was used to it at this point. It wouldn’t be the first time the redhead would get all up in his face and literally growl at him.

Bruce exhaled, long and deep, and relaxed in Hal’s hold, enough for the other man to effortlessly turn him around. He had been told, for years, that he needed to let people in and help, to let himself lean on others instead of shouldering everything alone.

 _“Who do you think you are, huh?”_ Hal had ask long ago, at the beginning of their relationship. _“Atlas? Carrying the whole damn world on your shoulders? That’s bullshit and you know it. You have an entire army of little vigilantes behind you, ready to help. An entire league of heroes even! So stop acting like you can’t rely on anyone, goddammit!”_

Hal had been furious that day, hands balled into fists as his voice had risen and risen until he had been shouting. Bruce had watched him, almost bemused, from his bed in the Watchtower’s med bay. Changes hadn’t occurred immediately but the more time had passed and the more Hal’s exasperated sighs and angry stares had chipped away at Bruce’s walls. So he had conceded. Little by little, month after month. Until he was able to let himself lean on someone and let them shoulder some of the weight he put on his own back with him.

Jason, ever so quick at prodding at any little soft spot Bruce had, had told him he was getting soft in his old age to which he had answered to with a smile before asking him for help on a case, effectively shutting up his son.

“Alright,” he said with a sigh when he felt Hal’s hands seize his face, cupping it gently.

They stayed like that for a while, embracing each other, Bruce letting himself be comforted once again. Hal led them back to the bedroom at some point, pulling him on the bed until he was laying half on top of him. He gave Bruce a radiant smile, brushing his fingers through his hair gently and Bruce let that smile be his beacon for now, leading him into another couple of hours of peaceful sleep, before facing reality again.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! 
> 
> Feedback is always welcome, especially since this is kind of a first so don't hesitate ^^)v


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